POLITICALLY CORRECT!!

I so love Heavenly jokes such as this. Enjoy!


THIS IS A NONPARTISAN JOKE THAT CAN BE ENJOYED BY BOTH PARTIES!
NOT ONLY THAT-- it is POLITICALLY CORRECT!!

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck
and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

'Welcome to heaven,' says St. Peter. 'Before you settle in, it
seems
there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see,
so we're not sure what to do with you.'

'No problem, just let me in,' says the man.

'Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do
is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where
to spend eternity.'

'Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,' says the
senator.

'I'm sorry, but we have our rules.'

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down,
down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself
in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and
standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked
with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him,
shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while
getting rich at the expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and
champagne.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good
time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he
realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises...

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter
is waiting for him.

'Now it's time to visit heaven.'

So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving
from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and,
before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St.Peter returns...

'Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now
choose your eternity.'

The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: 'Well, I would never
have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be
better off in hell.'

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land
covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it
in black bags as more trash falls from above.

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. 'I
don't understand,' stammers the senator. 'Yesterday I was here and
there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank
champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland
full of garbage and my friends look miserable.


What happened?'

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, 'Yesterday we were campaigning. . .

Today you voted.




"For God is the One Who, for His good purpose,
works in You both to desire and work"
(Philippians 2:13)




The only way to dispel the storms is to be grateful for what you have
today and what will happen tomorrow.

Subj: A Little Christian Humor

This is one of the best clean jokes I've seen in awhile!

Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who
was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God
was tired of hearing all the bickering.

Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I
am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I
will judge who does the better job.'

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.


They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports .

They did every job known to man.

Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster
than hell.

Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning
suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course,
the power went off.

Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse
word known in the underworld.

Jesus just sighed.

Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them
restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:

'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power
went out!'

Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his
files from the past two hours of work.

Satan observed this and became irate.

'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come
he has all his work and I don't have any?'

God just shrugged and said,

JESUS SAVES....
Keep the Faith!